0:00 Okay, as you guys know, I am expecting a daughter. Peter, I am a going to be father. >> Congratulations. >> Uh and so I I don't believe that I'm going to be an abusive parent, but I like the fruits that >> abuse produces. >> Yes. I enjoy that I had an abusive >> You think our parents knew? Like, "Yeah, I'm going to be abusive." >> I think my dad probably did. >> I think they're ████ impulsive. >> my dad was premeditated. >> I see. >> But but I think I really like how I turned out regardless, and I think we all kind of have things that we're like, "Ooh, that's not good parenting." And you know, like I guess like far and wide, but to us it actually helped a lot. How do I simulate being an abusive parent to make the most out of my kids? >> Were Were you abused? Were you abused?
0:50 >> Yeah. >> Right? >> Yeah, he's Asian and he's ████ a high achiever. >> I could tell you were abused, Peter. Yeah. >> That's the secret. >> Yeah, if you want exactly. But also, you're having a daughter. I feel like guys are usually nicer to their daughters. >> Hell yeah. >> Yeah. >> Or hit harder, am I right, brother? >> Then who hits them? The mom? >> The mom. >> But it's rare. Like, all of my Asian female friends, they don't have the same type of abuse stories that the guys do. >> Duh. So, like >> [laughter] >> But your sisters didn't get ████ up, right? >> No, I mean, they got ████ up. I just got ████ up more. >> [laughter] >> That was so fifth grade, dude. >> That's what I'm saying. >> Cuz like I want to be strict and I want to be like I don't want to actually abuse my daughter, but I want to I want to seem like I will. >> her to think that you could.
1:40 >> her to have the terror of it, but I don't want her to have the marks. >> You know what my mom used to tell me? My mom told me, she was like, "Man, I have to beat your ass. When I was a kid, your grandma would just give me the look." And I don't know how you can create the look, >> Oh. >> but it would be like she would say like she'll be ████ up and the grandma is like this or whatever and THEN SHE'S LIKE >> [screaming] >> I THINK GUYS GET BEAT BECAUSE WE'RE way more stubborn. >> The look don't work? >> Dude, I >> We're not looking. >> [laughter] >> No, well like haven't you seen like like ████ even little toddler girls? They're so obedient. They're not There's only one in our friend group that's like a little bit wild, but even then she's just a curious troublemaker. >> But still like half of a guy already. >> Yeah. They're They're intuitive like they they don't ████ around. Like guys are just crazy. >> But even in like talents and academics,
2:33 how do I get the most out of them? >> I have a good example. So like some people watch the recent Michael Jackson movie and go oh, "How terrible." And I see it as that's Asian upbringing right there. That excellence of Michael Jackson happened because of Joe Jackson. >> Yeah, the only difference is he had talent. >> But just in STEM fields. >> Yeah, that's what it is. It's like but black people focused on music and sports. Asians ████ focused on math. We got that Joe Jackson treatment. >> Asians focused on focused on curing their sickle cell anemia. >> [laughter] >> I I think you could probably simulate it by just instead of hitting them, just withhold love. >> [laughter] >> Do you know what I mean? LIKE IT'S JUST IT HURTS, but like you're not physically abusing them. >> So what's so successful? >> What's worse then? Is it or what's better? Is it better to >> Most people
3:23 >> beat the ████ out of them, but love them or not beat them and not even love them? >> I got both. >> Both. I got >> HE JUST GOT BOTH. >> You usually get both. It's like we hit you and we deprive you of love. But if you just do the "I'm not going to hit you, but I'm still going to deprive you of love." I think you'll still get like pretty good results. >> The idea of ████ unconditional love, that is a Christian Western thought. We don't get that ████ >> ████ >> Then what about what about the flip side where we do beat them, but we do love them? Isn't that good too or not? >> I feel like the beating thing is kind of hard in 2026 is what he's kind of saying. >> Yeah. >> But I hear it's coming back. >> Oh, really? >> I don't know. >> I know it. >> He's like, "I'm bringing it back." That's why I'm asking. >> a lot of parents that physically discipline their kids. I don't think they abuse them because it's the next generation and they're smarter from ours or like our parents.
4:13 But it's a common thing like even like Gio was telling me at the place she gets her hair done. She's like, "Oh, yeah, like the mom was like, 'Oh, yeah, I almost I smack Yeah, I smack the ████ out of them when they do that.'" >> it is? It's like It's like where It's like the It's the in between between like It's like where weed is. I feel like beating your kids is like marijuana laws in America. Back then it was either you do it and you don't give a ████ or you don't do it because it's like you can't do that. Now it's like, "Yo, everybody should just do it. You just got to do it in closed doors like behind private property like just don't do it in public. Don't let people know that you do it." >> That's true. >> Just do it. I asked ChatGPT. And it says that in America you have parent-child privilege and spanking is part of that where it's understood it's okay to physically discipline your kid. I don't know how that translate into actual social worker law and whether they're going to come grab your kid or
5:03 not, but it is still technically a legal thing. >> I think if that ████ leaves a bruise, that's like, "Yo, you kind of went far, brother." What about a little bruise? >> ████ up at the supermarket no more. I used to see that all the time growing up. >> Right. Yeah. >> Asian supermarkets fall in the category of private behind closed doors for the Asian community. >> No, 100% cuz everyone else all the aunties are in on it. >> Yeah, everybody's like, "You want me to hit them too? You need a break? You need to go shopping? I'll hit his ass too." >> Take my bamboo stick. >> Cuz certain certain melanin people I still see them drag their kid out by the ear. >> Oh, yeah, Walmart. You better get your ass in shape, mother >> Why did you say melanin people like this? >> The certain >> The skin. >> The certain >> The skin. >> I thought I thought was like their >> Especially when you >> I wish boxers. [laughter] >> When you go to the trampoline park and a lot of them are there. I don't
5:53 know why they all they love it there, but then when they don't act right, then you see their moms dragging them out by their ████ ear. >> True, that's true. >> Okay, I've been thinking about this cuz you know, I have a daughter now, very young, 5 months and I'm like how am I going to beat this kid without beating this kid, you know, the art of fighting without fighting. >> Mace her point in the eyes. >> That's >> [laughter] >> Blind them for life. >> And I thought and and I I want to show you this is a honest safe space. Don't tell anybody at home or online. Safe space, okay? This is bro code. >> What do you mean don't tell anybody? It's going online. [laughter] ████ That's hilarious. >> ████ safe space, Bart. You literally just ruined the vibe. Can we just at least make it feel like it? >> Bat. >> [laughter] >> Bat. Bat. >> Okay, what if you just like like really really ████ up her like prized things cuz it's just material ████ You know you could like replace that. >> Like get her favorite doll and smear it
6:43 in dog ████ >> Like >> [laughter] >> yeah, I mean I don't think I need to like get creative. I think it just needs to be like a deliberate like, you know, like I can do this. You know, yeah, she got like a doll. It's like yeah, this doll like this head's gone. Like it's in the trash can. I just don't think >> Or we'll just drop it in the trash. You know, depending on their age. Just drop it in the trash can. This is This is the stuff white people are doing nowadays. >> No, it's true. >> That's why they're all psychopaths. >> Yeah, yeah, yeah. You think That's what I'm saying. Does that lead into psychopath ████ Should I just hit her? >> Probably. I don't >> I think so. >> They take away privileges is what white people do. They take away privileges. >> I you get grounded? What if I'm like destroy >> They stuff they have. I was like I didn't have stuff. >> What if What if I destroy the toy? I don't take it I destroy it in front of you. >> Exactly. >> But if you hit Yeah, if you take their favorite teddy bear and you go look at this, Kimmy, and you tear the arm off, they're going to be a school shooter. >> Yeah, that's 100%.
7:34 >> Yeah. If you want to make one of those >> That's true. >> Okay. Okay. >> It sounds like a gay dad. >> [laughter] >> I feel like you're not allowed to hit your kid, but you should be allowed to like jujitsu your kid. >> [laughter] >> CUZ I'M NOT HITTING HIM. I'M NOT HITTING HIM. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? He knows how to tap. >> BEND [laughter] THE ARM BACKWARDS. JUST JUST A LITTLE KNEE ON BELLY ACTION. >> comes with an arm sling to school. No, he didn't hit me. >> Hey, he he should have tapped earlier. He should have tapped earlier. I taught him how to tap. >> I feel like boys respond well to that, but girls don't need to get physically like disciplined. Like they're so they're way more like obedient than girls. >> their dolls, right? >> [laughter] >> Girls are so mean to each other. It's like emotional abuse, you know, that they do to each other. >> Is that because is that because their fathers don't hit them? So their fathers have to like withhold love or say things
8:26 and it becomes like that's their weapon? >> Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't want them to be I don't want them to be a hoe. They work out. They start ████ learning how to fight ████ >> Don't withhold love to your daughter. She's going to be a ████ hooker. That's that's how it turns out. >> That's the >> Oh, that's why we have so many hookers. >> That is true. >> Don't try to >> But she could be a really successful hooker if you do it correctly. >> [laughter] >> But it's like [clears throat] the NBA, dude. Getting there is ████ low chance. A lot of people play basketball, but they don't make it to the NBA. >> about the WNBA, though, right? >> That's even worse. >> All right. >> Not a lot of people get there. >> So maybe it's the two methods. The girls, you don't withhold love, you beat them, >> [laughter] >> and then sons, you you do withhold love, you beat them. >> You still [laughter] beat them. >> What was the line for you because, you know, like when we we talk about being
9:16 forced into piano lessons, right? That's always like a really uh like a very abusive experience a lot of the time. >> Oh, yeah. >> For you, what was the line where you were like, "F███ it. I don't want to do it anymore. >> I kept getting ████ up. But like But lots of piano players get ████ up, but they end up really, really good. >> You're saying Joe's not good. >> Well, he quit. So I'm like, where did you tap out? What what was the tap out moment? >> I was I don't remember, maybe third grade, but the thing is I would go to violin and I get ████ up by this violin teacher. I would go to karate, get ████ up with from all the karate >> That's fair. >> I would come home from school and my grandma ████ me up cuz of cop I mean of the the the the the school called her. And then my brother was keying and he heard some ████ from other teachers and told on me and then I got ████ up again. So, all day I'm getting ████ up
10:06 by everybody. So, I was trying to remove all the the things one by one. I'm like, okay, well, piano's one of the things I need to stop cuz I'm getting ████ up for. So, I'm like, all these things I'm like, all right, so maybe school I could remove myself from. I blame that, not my behavior. I was too stupid to know that I was the cause of being a bad boy. >> But your piano teacher was your dad, right? So, what should I do because I'm probably going to be my daughter's piano teacher. >> Don't ████ her up. >> But I have to a little. >> NO, BUT THERE'S OTHER WAYS TO >> CUZ THAT'S HOW you achieve greatness. >> Yeah, that's true. I think how you achieve greatness though is to make them work through the tough ████ but not make them work through the tough ████ and add more tough ████ by ████ them up. >> Do you want her to be the best piano teacher? Is that your goal? >> I don't want to be her teacher. >> [laughter] >> Pianist pianist pianist? >> I think the goal for everybody is to
10:57 make them have self help like what do you you're trying to get them to achieve like self-discipline, right? Where they could keep going on their own. >> It's one of those things it's one of those things where like if I'm going to be a piano teacher to my kid, >> Yeah. >> I don't want them to not end up good cuz what are we doing here? >> [laughter] >> You know what I mean? Like years? Really? >> You know what my dad used to be? Like >> [laughter] >> What are we doing? Like what's the point? >> So, my dad was a piano teacher and and he was a music teacher. So, he would get mad at all the all the Asian ████ families that come and pay hell of money and he goes, "What's the ████ point of achieving this greatness if you don't even want them to be a pianist?" He says, "You're wasting my talent on teaching them." >> Woah, ████ >> No, I agree. Cuz all the Asians, they're like just doing it to compete with each other, but then then they quit.
11:47 >> Cuz he's like, "All they want is this ████ little piece so they could go to college and be like, 'I'm also a champion pianist.'" >> Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a flex. >> Wasted talent. Be a ████ pianist. >> It's family flex. Your dad is not good at business, huh? >> [laughter] >> He's horrible at it. >> I'm like, "Dude, this is the problem everyone desires in their business." >> [laughter] >> Cuz all the taekwondo schools are like, "Oh, you want this to put on your resume? Please come. Yes, you're going to get into UCLA, UCSD, USC." I don't give a ████ the reason why you want this. Just come here. >> He's like, you know, like when you stereotypical Japanese master, where he would like, "You know what? You're not a good student." They're ████ loaded, right? He goes, "I don't want to ████ keep you. You're a waste of my time." >> [laughter] >> Dude, that's My Japanese piano teacher was the same way. That's how He was
12:38 abusive, but it worked for me. >> Well, maybe you respond well. >> what was the tactic of abuse? >> The pencil. >> Like whack your hand or >> He'd sharpen a pencil and he'd hover it above your hand. And then if you played a >> creative. >> wrong note, he'd tap your hand. >> like you're allowed to do that to your daughter. >> [snorts] >> He's going to get lead poisoning. >> Blunt pencil and then it's okay. Blunt pencil. Or flip it, use the eraser. >> Yeah, yeah, yeah. >> [laughter] >> Just like a toothpick. >> Toothpick? >> Yeah. >> How about, "Honey, LET'S TRY THAT AGAIN." >> [laughter] >> YEAH, BUT LIKE HOW MANY TIMES ARE YOU GOING TO SAY that before you go to the pencil? >> I don't know. Girls are sensitive, bro. >> Okay, average pianist. >> Wait, say it say it exactly >> I'm not I can't even read notes, bro. I even took it in college. I couldn't ████ I still can't remember >> Say that sentence exactly the way you would as a dad giving a piano lesson. Like what's the best way to inflection-wise deliver that sentence?
13:28 >> How do you let's try again. >> Shut up. >> Got to be soft. You got to be soft. >> Soft? >> That's pretty good, actually. >> I made ████ girls cry at my store by just doing that. >> What did you say? >> So, uh this >> You said, "Honey, let's try again." >> No. This one this one girl >> Honey, let's try that again. >> You know that So, we had a boba machine where you can like seal it. >> Uh-huh, yeah. >> And then we had to replace the seal the the film. She had trouble doing it the right way. So, I made her keep doing it until she got it right. And I was like, "Hey, good job. Just try it again." "Oh, okay. You missed one part. Now, remember what it looks like. Try it again." She was like 17 or something, right? Still in high school. And then, um as she was doing it, she was getting so frustrated and she started tearing up. And I was like thinking that hey, she's really trying, but she just can't get it
14:18 and she's like mad at herself. >> Uh-huh. >> And then, so >> [snorts] >> she tries one more time, still ████ up. She ████ slams her ████ runs to the back, and cries to Hannah and says that I've been making fun of her. >> Oh. >> And I And then, Hannah's like, "What?" And then, basically she thought that I was being sarcastic because of how nice I was. >> Oh, she thought you were like being a satire of a >> Yeah. She thought my ████ praise of good job >> was like passive-aggressive kind of like ████ way of saying it. >> And then, but I've made a couple girls cry that way by just making them challenge themselves. That's why I was like, "Dude, girls are so different from boys." Like You're right. Yeah. I'm not even putting I'm not even putting the pressure on. I'm just making them learn the whole process and not give up. >> Right. >> I had a girl ████
15:08 shake and ████ cry on me because she couldn't make a drink correctly. After that, I was like, "I don't mind teaching girls anymore." >> Are these white girls or Asian? >> Asian girls. Yeah, but I was like I just >> Talk soft. >> I'm just not I'm just not going to ████ >> Damn, that's a new generation of Asian girls, man. >> I want to see the footage of Joe teaching them the first time. No, and he's like, "WHAT THE ████ I GET IT." >> [laughter] >> AND SO HE'S STANDING THERE, HE'S LIKE, "HONEY, try it again." And she's like, >> [laughter] >> That'd be funny if it was nothing like what you described. >> You see the footage? "YOU ████ DUMB ████ ████ YOU DUMB MICRONESIAN!" >> [laughter] >> PLEASE, PLEASE GIVE ME some tips in the comments below on how I can simulate abusive parenting without the abuse. I will be very thankful for
15:58 that. And please click on another episode immediately.
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