0:00 Ar- Argue with me. Nick would be a better dad than any of us. >> I agree. >> That's not an argument. Okay. >> Who? >> I disagree. >> The only reason I agree is cuz Nick's a better most things than any of us. >> Wow. >> Not everything. >> Not everything. Not everything. And then Oh, do you like this? I like go down and go down in detail. >> But most things I think Nick has a has a better brain for. >> So, I think Nick is already, you know, most people like they have kids and they become the dad? >> Yeah. >> I think Nick's been dad. >> Yeah. >> And then >> He's going to become a kid. >> [laughter] >> And then >> Benjamin Button it. >> And then the kid [laughter] just fill just kind of fills into the space already. Like >> There's already a place for him. >> Like the the ideal ████ sweetheart scenario is like high school sweethearts. Like he's already like imagine having those as your parents like your values.
0:51 It's crazy. It's like >> He has the most integrity out of any of us, yeah. >> It's pretty poetic. You get You could leave it at that. If you could take away everything, it's pretty poetic. >> High school sweetheart? >> Am I a ████ joke to you guys or something, dude? I feel like I come on this ████ show and you guys just ████ blow smoke up my ass. Like what [laughter] the ████ is this, dude? Is some charity case ████ dude? >> What is this charity? >> No, if you watched any episodes when you're not here, we say the same thing about you when you're gone. >> And then also like like what does every kid want? Every kid wants >> want me to do here? >> a dad that can protect them, right? >> Yes. >> Who can protect them better than Nick? >> Not against everything, though, you know, like cars cars are scary. Guns are scary. >> You also have a good mind where like all the things you can't protect your kid against, you're not really going to put them in those situations. >> Yeah. >> Like you're pretty smart at like you don't really go to dangerous places.
1:41 >> Yeah, you don't even You don't go out late at night. You don't do anything crazy. >> I think you're just really mindful of like where you are. >> I think I'm pretty boring and I think because I'm boring it seems like I don't do anything crazy, which is true, though. That's kind of the same thing, right? >> means you'll keep your kids safe. >> Okay, yeah. >> You'll keep your kids then. >> Well, I I also think that that's contextual, right? Because like you can be a boring person in your choices, but then you're choosing to be boring because Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, we just got back from this UFC event that we had to go to. I'm going to be in Vegas shooting JK with the boys. Well, I'll go roll in jujitsu. So, like what you do in your life is not boring. So, you choose to be boring. >> Your meter for boring is kind of funny, though. >> Yeah, it's different. You can't be ████ interviewing people that like a crazy UFC event and then come back and be like, "Dude, I >> You're like meeting stars of the your interest. >> Yeah, cuz it's >> That was like one time, though. That was like >> No, it's like every ████ week, MAN.
2:32 >> THAT WAS LIKE FOR ONE ████ you know, thing. >> No, like you're getting like ████ dim sum with Dana White or whatever the ████ >> I wish I was getting dim sum with Dana White. >> Everyone's like, "Oh, what you do?" And you're like, "I just had breakfast or whatever." >> I'm getting locks up with Bar None. And I'm like, "Yeah, dude." >> Yeah, you're doing you're interviewing all these stars and stuff all the time. >> I'm just saying I understand the boring choices. That's because you're not a boring life. Like you don't live a boring life. >> Also, you're you'd be a good dad because you're softy. >> Dude, you know what? Cuz me and Tiff are we're trying now and we're thinking about like >> Does it feel good to leave it in, though? >> Pretty good. >> Does it feel good when she leaves it in? >> [laughter] >> Even better. >> Helps him leave it in. >> Helps me finish faster, dude. No, but since we've been thinking about that and the idea of like becoming a dad is becoming kind of a little bit more
3:24 like less of an abstract thought. I find myself crying at ████ everything. >> Oh, dude, I love it. There you go. >> Yeah? >> Like that what? >> Like you know the like cuz my barometer before we started thinking about being parents or the potential would be like when on you're on an airplane and when you're on an airplane you just feel like you cry at things more, you know? Like for whatever reason you just feel like you're more emotional. And now I just feel like that all the time, dude. Anytime someone tells me a story about their kid, I just go, "Oh my god, that's ████ beautiful." And I have to like [laughter] bro, it's embarrassing. I have to like I have to like hide my eyes like cuz sometimes they feel like they're watering up and I'm like, "Oh, this is embarrassing." They just said they just took their kid to soccer and they love it and I'm like, "Wow, that's >> That's great. >> That's amazing. [laughter] >> See? Bro, you're good you'd be a great dad. >> Yeah, you're a great dad.
4:15 >> [laughter] >> Even just thinking about this made up scenario is making me cry. >> No, you're a great dad, dude. >> [laughter] >> No, I but I'm not even a dad yet. I feel like uh >> And you know what else make you a great dad? >> I was just going to say this. You know what I'm scared of? >> What? >> It's like because they tell you this feeling of like when you're a parent, they David was telling me this. He goes when he became a parent and the doctors kept telling him like like hey, don't remember don't shake the baby. Don't shake the baby. And they just kept saying that over and over again. And then David was like, "What the f███?" >> a shaky baby syndrome or what? >> Or sometimes like when people get frustrated with their baby they just tend to apparently this is a thing that like health care professionals have to mention to new moms. I don't know if you guys experience that. >> them? >> Don't strangle them in the bathtub. >> That's ████ crazy. >> Yeah, yeah, like don't shake them cuz
5:05 they're sensitive to movement, you know, and things like that. >> [snorts] >> And he was ex- he was saying, "Oh, the reason why they're telling you this is because like people get frustrated and they'll freaking like shut the ████ up, you know, like shake their baby in that and you're like, "Oh, f███." Like that's a real parent thing that you don't really know what's going to happen until you're kind of faced with it, you know? So, I think about that a lot. That scares me a little bit. >> to shake your baby, [laughter] dude? >> Yeah, but you got to think you you got to consider all possibilities though, right? >> level-headed you won't. >> sleep dep- No, but it's like under the conditions of you're sleep deprived, it's continuous nights, like you know, there's a lot of stresses that go into when you have a baby. So, these are just irrat- not irrational fears that I think about, but these are things that I think about. What about you guys? New dads? >> I think [laughter] it'd be way funnier
5:55 >> It's normal. >> I think it'd be way funnier if you just took your frustration out on people at the jiu-jitsu gym. >> Oh. >> That helps a lot. That helps a lot. >> That's like you're literally given a platform and a space to just let it out a little bit. >> Yeah, that's good. >> Yeah, that's that's why I like to do it, I think. That's why I like to train jiu-jitsu. >> He doesn't smile. >> Yeah, dude. >> Maybe there could be people you could train with that look like babies. >> I know a couple guys. >> [laughter] >> Bald man I know. >> Can you wear this diaper? Don't avoid my compliment. You know what You know what makes you a great father, in my opinion? >> What? >> You're like um you're so like you're just chill. Everything's chill. There's nothing's nothing's deep, nothing's heavy. But then when something like really when you believe in something, you stand on business. >> Think so, huh? >> Yeah. You like really like mm this is not this is what I believe and this is
6:45 what it is and and it's kind of backed by a really strong foundation of like a good like integrity. That's that's what it is. But you stay chill on everything. We could have like We could have like hot takes on this and that. You'll just vibe out, you'll joke, you'll play with the boys. But then when we get to something where you got to stand on business like you don't you don't falter. I like that. >> I'm more of like a five toes down kind of guy. Just like halfway. >> One foot out the door. >> Just [laughter] in case I get some new information. So that I can leave. Okay, thank you. That's very nice, actually. That's a very good point. >> you a good dad is your dad was ████ up. >> Oh [laughter] ████ >> Shut up, dad. >> You know, he tried You know, he's I wouldn't say he's completely ████ up, but you know, we're all we're all products of our parenting a little bit, right? >> learn a lot from it, you know? You're like, "Oh ████ this is what I like, what I didn't like." And you're an introspective guy. So instead of like
7:35 falling into the cycle, I think you'll be one of the ones that break the cycle. >> I hope, dude, cuz part of me feels like what if I keep continuing the cycle? >> What if you upgrade the cycle by doing better? >> What [clears throat] if I take this franchise to new heights? >> [laughter] >> Could be the Genie Buss of this whole thing. >> Genie Buss. >> [laughter] >> I like that we're saying this to Nick when he doesn't have a kid and meanwhile this guy's got a kid in like 9 weeks but >> Yeah, what about ████ Ryan as a dad? Let's not talk about me as a dad. Let's talk about the guy who's >> We've talked enough about that. >> Have we though? >> The The statement is that you're the best dad among us though. So we can still we can still vote for that, yeah. >> I'll try my best to to be as good of a dad as you. >> That's a very high honors but that makes me feel like like you're like the rookie prospect and then you ████ tear your ACL in the first year, dude. And he just go, "Man, he's never been the same ever
8:26 since, you know?" That's what I That's like That's the pressure you guys are putting on me right now. >> I I think I me and you have the same feelings about it though. Like where dude, like I when I think even for a second about how this person doesn't exist and they're just going to materialize into the earth like >> What the ████ is that about? >> a trip to me. Like this person like is literally coming into existence cuz of me and smack. And the fact that like it's a Also the fact that it's like this person didn't ask to be born. >> Yeah. >> Like they're just at the mercy of every ████ up that I could possibly make. And it's so like I guess like the gravity is so great, you know? >> No, that's that's the that's the feeling. >> It's the gravity that makes me emotional of like, "Oh my god, like this person didn't ask for any of this." >> You're going to make me cry right now. You feel my eyes water up, dude.
9:17 Get [laughter] the ████ Shut the ████ up. Don't say another word. >> Keep talking. Keep talking. Keep talking. Keep talking. >> It's also like that the fact that you know like you all the feelings that you have for your wife. >> Shut the ████ up, dude. You Keep her name out of your mouth, bro. >> [laughter] >> I don't even know her name. But like like when I think with me and Smack talk about this or think about this how like like the culmination of everything that we feel for each other is this new person. Like to have a physical like living symbol of that. Of like all the chain of ancestors we've had that meets right here and now it's like her is is so ████ heavy, dude. >> And a fun thought experiment [snorts] is to do the opposite of like what if I never even knew who the ████ you were and we just had sex and now we're faced with a situation. >> [laughter] >> And like that's just a thought experiment. >> You just You know You don't do that? You don't
10:07 >> Like a one-night stand like >> Yeah, like imagine if same people but like we just met and we just had sex and then we have a kid. >> That's something, too. >> Yeah, like imagine that scenario. >> I mean that that's where like it could have happened like up the chain somewhere in your own ancestry where like it didn't mean anything. It could have been, you know? That's why it's like it's crazy for us to like have the I guess the luxury of I guess building like such a household foundation of love, you know? >> Through intention, too. >> It's like that's so ████ like the fact you could even do that at all. >> Cuz our parents Our parents didn't have that. >> And that's probably very uncommon through history. >> Yeah. All our parents were arranged marriages, right? >> [laughter] >> I don't even know. I feel like my parents both lied to me about it, so I have no idea. >> Yep. >> But yeah, that's I feel the same as you, man. It's the ████ weight of it, you know? >> When I found out my dad was a passport bro, I was like, "Come on, dude."
10:58 >> He was a passport bro? >> Kind of. He went over and grabbed my mom in Singapore. >> Yeah, that does happen a lot. >> And I'm like, "Damn, dude." >> [laughter] >> That's not good? >> No, I don't know. It's well, they might tell you it wasn't good. >> It's also a trip because, you know, like you're going to have like a mixed kid. >> Bro, for real. >> Like the chain went down with ████ all these like big-eared Asian guys and >> [laughter] >> you it's a different DNA construct. >> Yeah, it's crazy. >> Like your your life is you he's this child I may may or may not have is going to go through a complete different experience that I can never relate to. That me and Tiff can never like >> You'll never fully identify, you know. >> You're going to be always kind of looking Asian. >> [laughter] >> People are going to be confused by that. >> They might only have one big ear. >> No, they're going to have both big ears
11:49 cuz Tiff behind her beautiful hair, she got some ears on her. >> [laughter] >> She knows that though. >> What the heck? >> She got some ears on her. Some beautiful ears. >> [laughter] >> They're symmetrical More symmetrical than mine. They look way better. >> She got some hear ye, hear ye's. >> If I have a kid, it's going to be blind as well. >> Blind? [laughter] >> Cuz I'm me. I'm blind. >> are. >> I'm blind. I'm like I'm like negative six or seven, I think. >> I'm blind. Tiga has good vision. >> Oh, really? >> I'm negative 11. >> Does Geo wear glasses? Perfect vision? >> No, she has like she has a little bit. Like negative one or two. >> Okay, maybe maybe >> Wait, you're blind right now? No, I got LASIK. Not LASIK, it's another type of surgery. >> ICL. >> Yeah, ICL. It's like a perfect Not a perfect the a permanent lens that they put inside. >> Wow. >> Sounds very Summerlin. >> Yeah, [laughter] but it's like yeah, I was negative 11 though. >> Damn. Negative 11 is crazy.
12:40 >> That's legally blind. >> Yeah, yeah, yeah. >> That's like more than legally blind. >> But now it's perfect and I've had it for like over 10 years now. >> Oh, all right then. >> Maybe maybe when you have a kid just slide it right in there in their eye. >> Put these contacts in. >> Yeah. No, it's going to be freaking nuts, man. >> We'll see, dude. >> You'll be a great dad. Yeah. >> That makes me feel a little bit more confident going into this. >> dad of the group. >> You will see. You'll be the best dad. Thank you guys so much. >> Arguably. As long as you're not shooting blanks. >> We'll see. Only time will >> Do they taste like they're blank? >> [laughter] >> I've tasted blank shots and they taste full, dude. >> Blank. >> [laughter] >> This one's got some substance. >> Lacking lacking umami to it.
// end of tape